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Wednesday, May 2, 2007
The Fifth Column
Since we were recently referred to as "blog virgins" and accused of not making clear enough links to the blogs we are reviewing... I'll dumb this down for y'all.

Blog Being Reviewed: THE FIFTH COLUMN <== Click there, you fucking idiot.

Does that help? Good.

Back to business.

First Impression: Boring template.

Template: Boring. Drab. Not nearly as fresh as I would expect from the three authors who call The Fifth Column home. With names as "funky fresh" as Schadenfreude, Bacon Boy, and Max Power-- I expected more. Fa-real. Props, word to ya mutha... I'm a white girl trying to act all wit' it and shit.

Oh no she di'int!

*clearing throat*

OK, change of plans. That's not working for me.

Back to the template. The only good thing about it is that they come up with fresh new mastheads on a pretty regular basis, and they always include a catchy tagline to go along with it. You can see some of their past ones here. So, even though the template is pale and lifeless, like a man's penis while dreaming of Bea Arthur and Rue McLanahan gettin' it on in an old lady lesbian romp, they spice it up and make it funnier than shit with their mastheads. Nice clean page, everything where it should be. They've sorted the best posts from each author and you can view those here.

Content: Two words. THEY ROCK. More words: People may be offended by some of the things they have to say, but I'm in love. Seriously. Blog love, ladies and gentlemen. They tell it like it is, which is how we should all be. They're honest, yet sarcastic and fucking hilarious. Smartasses are SOOOOO much better than dumbasses, right? They are a great team, and I'm so thrilled to have found this site, I'm almost willing to flash the bodacious ta-tas just to reveal my excitement.

Clutter: None.

Would I Return?
You bet your sweet bippy I will!

Rating: 9

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5 Comments:

Anonymous Sexy Simone says...

LMAO - This has to be the funniest review yet from you!

Don't you fret, I'm late and I know it... I'm trying!!!

5/02/2007 6:22 PM  
Anonymous Schadenfreude says...

Well hot damn -- thank you for that endorsement, Diva Dee!

But on to the important stuff -- what's it gonna take to get you to go from "almost willing" to full-on realized bodacious ta-ta exposure?

I'm here to help.

Thanks again.

Schad

5/02/2007 9:56 PM  
Blogger Lia says...

Y'know - I had the same first reaction to the blog, and the same first reaction to the top post. Hi-larious!

Right on review!

5/03/2007 3:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous says...

Maybe your readers don't get your links because your links don't look like links. They have no distinction. They look exactly like your headers for "Template" and "Content," etc. Before calling everybody else stupid, try to see first where all the stupiditiy is coming from. In this case, it's all coming from you.

I can't understand why you are always calling other people stupid. It's like the pot calling the kettle black.

-The Laitera

5/05/2007 8:44 AM  
Blogger RubyLou says...

Laitera... Do the words "lighten up" and "entertainment blog" mean anything to you? Do you need a hug?

We realize the links blend in with the review and it's a template issue... it could be tweaked... but, if anyone has trouble figuring out a white bolded blog title is the link to the blog, well, then they ARE stupid. In my own reviews, I make the title of the blog large and put a line separator between the post title and the blog being reviewed just to make it more clear.

Now, go away.

5/07/2007 11:06 AM  

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