Georgian Blues

Georgian Blues is a blog I have seen in my travels and I have a definite opinion about. Whether that opinion is good or bad remains to be seen :)

Template - This is a tough one - because I like the blog, but hate the template. For me, that is a strong word, but not one given without advice on how to change it. It is sort of typical blogger, but the background is changed, and not necessarily in a good way. It is dirt brown. Brown is NEVER good on a blog. It sort of works when put altogether, but I think for the writer's personality, she could change the template to more fit her. The sidebar is neat and organized without too much crap which is always enjoyable! Google free blogger templates and find one to fit who you are! Standard templates never show off the true persona.

Content - This is typical life stuff. She is a mom of 2 kids but it is definitely not a mommy blog. Theresa (Don't call her Terry!!), has a good mix of interesting subjects, with a few meme's to read. It is easy reading, and you can easily find yourself checking back to see what she is up to. I think this blog is more geared to women then men because it talks about motherhood, goals, life journey's, and dieting... which works for this particular genre. If you get a chance, check out the squirrel saga - it really does make you laugh!

In summation - Lose the template, and your good. Your blog won't appeal to all, but for me I find it to be a great tale of your life and everything that it includes.

Rating - 6 out of 10

Just Another Quick Question

JAQQ2 is a sequel blog, so already I know the first one must have been popular, but the question remains as to why they started a sequel blog after they retired the first blog?? I guess I should find out huh?

Template - Well, the header fits the blog I suppose - A big ole' question mark at the top. I like the font, the colors are easy on the eyes, and it is relatively soothing. I suppose that you could read into it, that is relatively boring also, but I'll let you make your own judgement. The sidebar is nice organized, and for the most part it is "okay". There is no wow factor here, none whatsoever, but it is "okay".

Content - Well I have to admit I got kind of sucked into the questions. They are meant to thought provoking, and unless you are like some people without a brain (Britney Spears, and Sanjaya), you will most likely stop to think about your answer. Granted, I did not ponder for long, but it was enough to say "Hey I would do this, or that".

There was one particular one on the first page that I have yet to come up with an answer for -

What I want to know is... If you could pick an "entrance" song, what would it be? Do you get me? A song that you'd play as you enter a room.

I think it is a pretty fascinating question actually! For me I was considering "Chic" by Le Freak, but all in all, I'm not sure I'm very "Chic" although I would like to be in my next life.

Anyhoo... check it out, at the very least it can give you something to talk about for a minute or two.

In Summation - Well, it's okay. Conversation piece - yes? Blog I would run to every day as soon as I wake up? No

Rating - 5 out of 10

We're Hiring!

If you are a regular reader, you have surely noticed by now that our reviews have been few and far between lately. I suppose that's what happens when you take 3 busy moms, who also run their own personal blog, and expect them to crank out reviews several times a week.

We're going to be making some changes soon. We will continue to do 2 reviews per day, but now we will only be doing them Monday-Thursday.

That being said, we would like to appeal to our readers. If any of you are interested in becoming a regular reviewer here at So Many Blogs, So Little Time please shoot us an email. We can promise to keep your identity confidential, as long as you promise to do the same.

Man, woman, gay, straight, black, white or purple-- we don't care who you are! As long as you have a thick skin, can offer lots of humor, possess a quick wit and smart-ass attitude-- we'd love to have you join us...

So are you up for the foursome? Especially with three beautiful ladies with big boobies?

Bumpy Bones

In my previous review, I was complaining about an ADULT acting and speaking like a teenager. I sat here for a few minutes pondering what in holy hell our world is coming to, and how can anyone rely on this younger generation to take care of the world. While the rest of us are sitting in nursing homes pooping through our Depends, this bunch of teenagers and young twenty-somethings will be adults walking around with their heads up their butts and sending stupid-ass text messages.

Then, lo and behold, in walks a blog that changes my opinion. Just like that.

Bumpy Bones

Template: I like the idea of the template, and it fits the theme this blogger is going for, but I think it could be better. Maybe-- its a free one I've seen many times, and it even comes in a variety of colors to fit the mood. But it's not obnoxious or gaudy, and it certainly doesn't make me want to run for the hills. So it'll do.

Content: Leapin' Lizards! This young blogger has got years worth of knowledge in her 17-year old brain, and is certainly going through a lot of tough decisions right now. I couldn't figure out why I recognized this blog, and just by her style of writing, I knew I had read her somewhere before.

Wait! ! We reviewed her other blog, Miss Misery Smiles not that long ago. I knew it!

While Miss Misery Smiles seems to be a normal journey into a mature teenagers daily life, Bumpy Bones delves farther into the reason Miss Jessica is the way she is. Here is a 17-year old who suffers from a disease called MHE -- Multiple Hereditary Exotoses is an "inherited disorder of bone growth - basically meaning that if you have it, you have extra bones in your body. " So I read through the archives of Jessica, this teenager full of knowledge and wisdom many of us spend our lives trying to acquire. And I like her. I like her as a person, and I like her as a blogger. She goes through stories of her disease, her feelings about the topic, and discusses in detail her experiences with surgeries and what sounds like many doctor visits. She discusses scars she has all over her body from numerous surgeries. People, bottom line-- she has too many bones. Sometimes bones start growing out of nowhere onto existing bones. So she has some of them removed. And often they grow back. Then the process starts all over again. Hence, the title "Bumpy Bones."

Also, because of her disease she is faced with some tough decisions that -- quite honestly-- no 17-year old should have to make. She certainly has a good head on her shoulders, and it sounds like she carefully calculates every decision every day in her life. But to have to make the decision to go to college or not? I feel for her.

When all is said and done, all Jessica really wants to do is help other people suffering from the same or similar infliction to have an insiders view as to what she's gone through. My opinion is that this blog should be required reading for every teenager, so they know that the drama of losing a cell phone or being pissed someone didn't ask you to the dance is nothing compared to what other teens go through on a daily basis.

Clutter: None. Sidebar is neat and clean... could be shortened up a bit. But I would prefer Jessica spend more time on her writing than on messing with her sidebar. The writing is what I want to see the most.

Would I Return? Yes. Most definitely. Hell, I've already added her to my Bloglines!

Rating: 8

Bi Any Other Name

So, we can all pretty much guess a little about this blogger simply "bi" the title...right?

Bi Any Other Name

Template: It's decent. Good color scheme, the picture is nice. But I will admit I truly dislike the diagonal banners put on blogs... basically all that tells me is that you have too much shit in your sidebar, so you plaster a few more things on the corner of your site so it doesn't get lost in the mix. Here's a hint, why not just delete half the crap-ola off your sidebar, and call it a day?

Content: Song lyrics, blurbs about what she ate, who she talked to, and it all adds up to fluff. Pure fluff. Argh, I feel like I am sitting in the middle of one of my daughter's slumber parties, and they are all sitting in a cirlce texting each other teenager jargon I will never quite understand. It is the seventh circle of hell. Bad thing, I really don't think this blogger's a teenager. I think that makes it even scarier.

Clutter: jeez-US! Is this a blog or a teenager's MySpace page? Good Lord, look at all the shit we've got on this page! What She's Reading, What She's Listening To... and a million tiny buttons, pictures, shoutboxes... I really hate this blog. That sums up my opinion on this fine rainy morning. I. Hate. It. --- fuck!

Would I Return? No. Period.

Rating: 1 (simply for the colors and the template - everything else sucked.)

Arthur's Hall of Viking Manliness

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Arthur's Hall of Viking Manliness

Template - Or shall we just call it "Turn off #1!"

Ok, turnoff #2 - The ads. I don't like commercials at the beginning of movies in the theater or on DVD, I think TIVO is the greatest invention ever, I think telemarketers should find a better way to make money, like prostitution, and I HATE SEEING ADS ON BLOGS! Give me a break already. As if we aren't bombarded by someone trying to sell us something in every other aspect of our lives.

Turnoff #3 - The template colors. You didn't assault me enough with the title, the ads and the political blather? You had to bring it all home with the shit-ass colors, did ya? You are one cocky son-of-bitch, aren't you? I bet you think your penis is gigantic, too. Do you beat your naked chest and chant "I am King of all I survey!!" every morning before your usual protein shake and raw egg breakfast?

My. Eyes. Hurt. How many times do I need to tell you people that light font on a dark background SUCKS! Oh, what's that? I only said that once? WELL IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ENOUGH!

Turnoff #4 - You have to "CLICK TO READ MORE" on every post! Did we not just go over this? PEOPLE HATE THAT! I'M TYPING IN CAPS WAY TOO MUCH BECAUSE I'M IRRITATED AND ACTUALLY YELLING!

Turnoff #5 - It seems they only post once a week if not less!

Moving on...

Content - Reading this blog is probably the equivalent of taking testosterone injections, daily. I think I'm starting to grow a penis and facial hair as we speak. Some posts are political, gag. Some are pure word vomit from an overly manly man. One, I found awesome... this, right here. And that is as far as I got, I was getting a headache from the colors. Now here is the interesting part...you know, earlier, when I exercised my gift at stereotyping and generalizing people by insinuating he drinks protein shakes and eats raw eggs for breakfast? Well, I didn't realize how right on I probably was!! Read this. Pay close attention to #'s 6, 11, 20 and 27. Sometimes I scare myself at my stereotyping skills. And I gots skillz baby!

Here is the turning point in this review... oddly enough, during the course of writing this I have softened like a man's penis after seeing a Joan Rivers naked. I still hate the template, but realize it's fitting. The colors just need to be altered. Apparently, my disdain for the template and terrible first impression made me want to hate this blog. But, I can't continue to hate like that. See, ironically, as much as I love gay men, I also LOVE manly men. There is no black and white here. You are either gay or you are a man. Period. Ever since the metrosexual thing started I wanted to puke. Men need to be men. No man of mine is going to get pedicures with me or wear man-capris and carry man-bags. Fuck. That. We will not fight for mirror time and you will NEVER borrow my hairspray. If you do, your gay... and I'll still love you, but I'll want a divorce. Okay? Okay.

With that being said, I could find myself enjoying these posts despite the 5 turnoffs. Why? Well, it's simple... I'm the girl at the BBQ that is hanging out drinking beer with the guys while the girls are all sitting in a circle in the lawn chairs giggling and sipping cocktails. I have my girl moments, I'm addicted to purses and sunglasses and can shop very well. But I have always enjoyed male friends more and would rather talk shit with them than talk about the latest hair highlights. So, to be honest, I could deal with this blog much easier than the uber-sweet mommyblogs.

I can understand the Viking figure as a representation of manliness but Shatner is lost on me. Why him? Conan in your header should be used in place of Shatner. But, maybe Shatner is a guy thing... like the 3 Stooges. Only men seem to get the 3 Stooges. Go ahead, test that theory. I'm right. Anyway, the blog, I like. I didn't at first... but now I do.

In Summation - This blogger chews, probably grabs his crotch in excess of 100 times a day, loves guns, South Park, heavy metal (not the pussy heavy metal either) and is a very proud American. Can't really fault the guy for that! Besides, he had me hating him at first, now I'm diggin' him... and his partner Shatner because of the Beer Post.

Rating 7 out of 10

The Queer Chef

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The Queer Chef

Template - I love it, but I'm not in love with it. I love it because I seem to have an odd fixation with everything green these days and it's "Mr. Clean" clean. I love things that are "Mr. Clean" clean. But I'm not in love with it because it's a tad boring. This isn't a bad thing though. I just like a bit more flare... personal choice. The header pic is awesome even though it's "Anime-ish" and I don't dig on Anime. Still, hil-AAARRRRR-ious picture. Right on my little gay friend. Right on. Seriously, a lot of bloggers could learn a thing or two from this template... like how to organize and live clutter free. Yet another reason why I love gay men. And, believe you me, I LOVE gay men.

Content - Well, this I don't love so much. Truthfully, the posts are mundane. But, his personality shines through them sometimes. I read a few posts farther back and found some interesting things out so I'm sure if I were to keep reading I would find more. One thing I read that caused me to fall head over heels in love with this adorable little gay man is that he loves Ghost Whisperer. OMG I TOTALLY LOVE GHOST WHISPERER! LOVE. IT! He also posted a video of Jennifer Love Hewitt's that I had never seen. I knew she could sing but never saw her sing or saw any videos. Now, I'm even more in love with her. As if that were possible. So, for posts that are boring there sure is a lot of love flying around here. I am not liking his "click here to read more" thing at the end of some posts. Just put the whole damn thing up there. If it's to keep the page shorter, fine, but the posts are not that long anyway, so just put the whole thing up!

Sidebar - Perfection. Complete and total perfection

In Summation - Honestly, for content that's pretty mundane I sure read a lot. I enjoyed this blog.. I might even go back to it.. and not just because I loves me some gay men either.

Rating - 7 out of 10

Peter Porcupine

My brain hurts today... *sigh*

Let's end my week with a bang, shall we? Anyone up for a political blog?

Then, feast your eyes on Peter Porcupine, the latest blog to grace my list of reviews. Apparently, we are going to review the blog of a dead porcupine. Seriously though, Peter Porcupine is the pseudonym of William Cobbett, a journalist in early America. Interesting. (and yes, I had to look it up. WTF-ever!)

Template: Again, boring blogger template. *yawn* Neutral colors, khaki, green, brown. *sigh*

...feeling sleepy...

...must nap...

...zzzzzzzzzzzz...

HUH-WHAT THE--- did I just doze off?

Sidebar: Totally a jacked-up cluttered ball of crazy.

But, let me get this off my chest first:


Back to the sidebar-- TOO MUCH, TOO MUCH, TOO MUCH! Blogrolls, categories, and all sorts of mumbo-jumbo are cluttering up this blog to no end. And the "Gaggle" cartoon screws up your sidebar, making it and everything below it fall to the bottom of your page. Maybe you want it that way, but it doesn't mesh well with your layout. Fix it. NOW.

Your blogrolling blogroll needs to be shortened, and you can do that by Googling "roll-up blogroll" or something similar, and finding the code necessary to do that. Or give the blogroll its own post, and link only that page on your sidebar. Otherwise, your sidebar drags on for miles. Miles longer than your wordy posts. You could probably do the same for your "About Me" section... too long, I'm afraid. Put it in a separate post and link to it on your sidebar.

Content: It's OK. I'm not normally one interested in political debate, and I believe campaign commercials should be banned until 90 days before the election. We have a year and a half before the next presidential election, and I'm already tired of all of them. I vote to stick them all in a room together and let them listen to each other talk... They'll eventually kill each other off, and the last one standing gets to be President.

Although I don't give a hoot about politics, I do find some of the posts interesting. Many of them bore the shit outta me, but there are a few posts in there worth reading. But once again, many of them were over my head. And I ain't too proud to admit that tidbit of information to you all. If I was more active in politics or followed it more closely, I might like this blog a little more.

Would I Return: Probably not. But I can see this blog has its niche in the blog-o-sphere, and just needs some more readers to find it. There's people out there that would love this blog, so check it out for yourself.

Rating: 6 -- Mostly because the template and the content stay true to the purpose of the blog.

What do you think?

The Wonderful World of Joseph McCrumble

Ok, I just got a good chuckle out of opening this site, because the first thing I saw was "Breast is Best" as the name of his most recent post. Interesting to say the least... here we go with The Wonderful World of Joseph McCrumble.

Template: Standard Blogger template, blue, blue, blue. Sidebar is way too long, and he's another blogger that chooses to put his Archives & Previous Posts at the very bottom. Sort through the fluff and prioritize your sidebar. It's YOUR BLOG, so put YOUR archives and posts first. If we like what we see, we might cruise through your blogroll. But first and foremost, make some changes to entice people to stay at your site.

Content: I'm struggling with this one... what is my opinion of this blog?

*dead silence*

*crickets chirping*

*awkward pause*

Hell, I'll come right out and say it. I don't understand this blog. It is either a wacky attempt at humor, or a true story, or its so far above my head that I just don't get it. And now I'm intimidated because I don't know which it is.

I read through many posts, and honestly-- I don't like it. I don't like feeling that I'm not smart enough to understand something. I am having flashbacks to high school and my Advanced Placement Literature class. The teacher assigns a pop quiz. Everyone else spent the previous night reading the assigned chapters in the book, yet I chose to hang out at the lake with my friends, drinking beer and smoking cigarettes.

Is this the Scots poking fun at us free-wheeling Americans, giggling at the fact that most of us have no culture? No understanding of anything outside of our own backyard? Sheesh, I'm waving the white flag here, Dr. McCrumble. Because in my case, you might just be right. I read the most recent post (WTF?), saw the cute pictures of your new baby (Congratulations), and then I got lost. Like in high school, I tried cheating by skimming through other areas of the blog, hoping to catch a glimpse of my diminishing brain power. Now I'm choosing random months of the archives, hoping for something, anything to keep me motivated to pay attention to this blog. It's just all a blur of Ugandan elections, a very "interesting" research assistant named Ravel, and so much more.

For the sake of ending this review and putting you all out of your misery from my random ramblings, I'm giving this one:

Rating: 5

If you want to give your own review of this blog, please leave it in the comments. I'd love to hear what all of our readers think.

Tagged and Bagged

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Tagged and Bagged

Template - It's a template that I see entirely too much of. It's a free template that has worn itself out. He did add his own embellishments to it which show some creativity and also show a great direction that he could run with if he would get a new template.

Content - This is what I consider to be an artsy blog. Even though I love art, all forms, I'm indifferent to this blog. I think the idea of his blog, his photographs and his explanations are actually intriguing but it's just bland. The potential is there.... oh it's there. However, he indicates in his about me section that he is learning.... so hopefully he will grow.

Sidebar - No need to even mention... it's just fine on it's own.

In Summation - Finding art in graffiti is not a new concept but it's not over done either. This blog could really be something. For starters, a new template.

Rating 6 out of 10 - A new template, a few spices, some personality and it could be a 10.

Let's Talk

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Let's Talk

Template - Plain but acceptable. The header picture is a heavily pixelated and distorted fragment of Michelangelo's treasured painting from the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. He claims to be a computer geek so I would expect him to be able to display a masterpiece like this in a better manner. The rest of the colors are easy on the eyes but anti-climactic.

Content - Well, I don't like to pick on someone who served our country, so let me say this first: Whether you served in war-time or not, whether you fought in the front lines in Iraq, Kuwait, Afghanistan, Bosnia or even Vietnam (your age isn't clear) or whether you worked in a cozy office on a base in Nebraska, thank you. Thank you for choosing to enlist knowing there was always a chance that you could see a war and might have to sacrifice your life if necessary. No matter if you fought for this country or not, joining the military is a sacrifice and an honor, regardless.

Now, as for the blog... it's a political blog with some health thrown into the mix, at least in the early days of it's existence. Interesting mix of content. I think most of the recent posts are all political though. Fun...a blog about hating President Bush and everything that is wrong with this country. Number one, I hate politics. I am not going to delve into those reasons right now because it's not about me, it's about this man's blog. Number two, I hate reading political blogs, because of reason number one. However, this needs to be objective and fair. So, it doesn't matter what side of the political fence he is on and the fact that he spews his opinions in a blog. It's the fact that his grammar sucks and he uses random commas in odd places which drives me insane!!! I don't care what you are writing about, have some pride in your work and try to be correct! It's not what you are saying, it's how it's being written. Obviously, political blogs are only for a select group of people and much like "mommybloggers" they stick to their own kind. Call it a modern caste system of blogging... but it's not forced. I am not part of the political blog caste system and even if I were I don't think I would really pay much attention to this particular blog. It just doesn't stand out.

Sidebar - The sidebar is ok but the archives are too long. They need to be rolled up or at least utilize the format that is in his other blog... using the months instead of dates. It will shorten it substantially.

In Summation - Blah Blah Blah.


Rating - 3 out of 10 - 3 points for effort

Ribless Musings

Ribless Musings

First Thought - OH FUCK!! WHY ME??

Template - A blogger original, and not even one of the good ones. Blue - just plain blue. No color except for the posting titles which are this funky shade of gold. YUCK YAWN YUCK!

Content - Could someone please tell me why I am reviewing a person who posted 20 posts in 2 months, which isn't altogether horrible, and then posted 11 times in 8 days in March and then stopped. Completely stopped, hasn't been heard from since.

Blah! Have enough decentcy to take your damn name of the list!

Anyhow - back to content - it sucks. 'Nuff said.

Rating - 0 out of 10

Lost In The Battle

Lost In The Battle

Template - You know, I've never been a fan of the Fushia look - hot pink if you may... but this template is pretty good! It is a great combo of black and bright pink that really makes everything stand out. The header is kind of cool, and the sidebar is PERFECT! Let me repeat - I said Perfect! Take notes people, it is extremely well organized, and very pleasing to the eye! The posts are seperated nicely so you are certain where one ends and one begins. The more I look at it, the happier I am!

Content - Let's see, the first words that come to mind are witty, funny, and generally pretty good. Some of the posts are definitely big yawns, but for the most part they are easy reading and enjoyable. There really isn't too much to say because it is above average but not like "Wow" she is the best writer ever! It is a lot of "life" stuff, like root canals, kids, snow, and SD - her ex that is now called Sperm Donor.

In Summation - You might have to go back a few months to really get to know her but it seems like if you do you might enjoy reading her. As for me, I did enjoy it, I just didn't get drawn in like I would have to go back, ya know?

Rating - 7 out of 10

A Tale Told By An Idiot

This is quite the busy explanatory little blog.

Meet Lia from New York. Her blog is A Tale Told By An Idiot.  Boy oh boy, has she been preparing for a review. She studied our reviews like she studies for an exam.   She's apparently studied what we like and dislike about blogs, and she's made some changes and added some explanations to a lot of her posts and her sidebar. Maybe a little too much explanation, but I give the girl props for her effort.

Template: White with a neutral header graphic. Normally this would cause me to have a BF, but I will refrain. (BF = Bitch Fit... haven't you people ever seen the movie "White Chicks?") The template isn't bad, per say, but for a young girl from New York, it certainly isn't what I expected. I think I would ditch the explanation of your title, and just call it:

A Tale Told By An Idiot
...because life is not trademarked.

I knew what you were going for in your title, without reading the explanation, but I'm smart. So leave it without explanation for us smart people, or dumb it down for everyone else. Don't do both. It makes your title too wordy.

The sidebar is neat and clean, and the choice of titles for categories is way cool. I've never been much of a Shakespeare fan myself, but I can see where you're going, and your blog has a purpose. Archives are neat, blogroll is short and sweet. And people, she's got Radioactive Jam on her short list, so thats a plus right there! (Radioactive Jam just happens to be one of Ruby Lou's favorite reviews she's done! lol)

My one question about the sidebar is the list of links under the "View My Complete Profile" thing... what are all those for? I know what she was aiming for. She was wanting to avoid our biggest complaint we have when reviewing blogs, which seems to be lack of a bio or explanation of WHY someone is blogging. As Ruby Lou likes to say, a blog's gotta have INTENT. So although Lia is trying hard to make sure everyone understands her blog, she forgot one important piece of knowledge. There is a HUGE difference in needing to explain something because you are too vague and your writing sucks, and needing to explain something because we are not smart enough to understand what you are trying to say. Your blog is the latter.  Don't waste your time accomodating those people that wouldn't know a Capulet from a catapult. Seriously.

Content: I already touched on this in the "Template" section, so let's continue. Lia, my dear, you're a WRITER. Your posts are deep, funny, and thought-provoking. I felt my IQ wanting to creep up a couple of points just from reading your blog. Hell, even your readers seem smart! Blogs can be a huge waste of time or a terrific outlet for creative energy. You've got more creative energy than I've seen in a long time, and you're not just taking up space in the vast expanse of the internet.  We should all take a listen every so often to what you have to say.

Clutter: None.

Would I Return? Yes. While her style and content may not be for everyone, I happen to like her.

Rating: 8

RAWR! The Blue Panther Experience (and other things)

Son of a bitch! I was feeling all organized and shit, waiting to have my morning coffee before sitting down to do my reviews. I got all situated, french vanilla creamer in my coffee, comfy chair, multiple browsers ready to open sites with the click of my mouse.

I started typing the review of The Blue Panther Experience (and other things) and was at least halfway through it. In my haste to answer an annoying-as-fuck ringing phone, I knocked over the steaming hot french vanilla cup of wakey-wakey-caffeine-goodness. While crying over spilt milk HOT COFFEE, I jumped up, knocked my keyboard, and lost the review I had so painstakingly written. I frantically started clicking on stuff, not worrying at all about the second-degree burns currently happening on my gorgeous Diva-licious thighs. It was all in vain, because my review was gone. Gone!!!

*sigh* Now that I have recovered, gotten a new cup of coffee and changed clothes, I am ready to roll.

Template: Well, it's got a panther. And that panther is blue. Yeah, that's the ticket. This blog has got color. That color is blue, and there is lots of it. It has the usual stuff-- previous posts, archives, and miscellaneous other little goodies like his site meter and shit. I was happy to see a link to "View His Complete Profile" because I wanted to know a little more about how the blog got its name, how it began, and why the panther is so blue. Is it sad? Nope, it's really just colored blue. So you can see how disappointed I was to click on the link, thinking I would find out the juicy info as to how this blogger came to be. Yet all it did was show me the same freaky picture as his site does, with a link back to his site. Hmmmmph. Maybe I'll check through some of the archives to see what this cat is all about.

Content: Back to the beginning. The blog just starts up out of the blue. (Blue... get it? God, I crack myself up.) No explanation as to why he started blogging, he just starts right up and thats it. I start paging through the archives, and FINALLY see a post titled "ABOUT ME" and I start jumping for joy because I think I've discovered the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow! Then I realize I'm in jepoardy of looking even more blonde and spilling yet another cup of coffee, so I calmly sit back down and take a gander at the post.

About Me? More like about everyone BUT him. He talks about a couple books, several movies, and Friends. Yes, the TV show. WTF? Nothing about him that I can see. After reading through more of the archives and seeing lots of "Blog Your Blessings" posts and fluff posts, I don't see where this blog is going. I guess the dude wants to be a writer but I don't see it. I'm bored to tears, and I myself am starting to feel a little blue.

In addition to that, he apparently wants to do whatever it takes to get traffic to his site. This guy is EVERYWHERE. I used to laugh when I'd see him in the Blog Explosion "Shout Box" because he seemed to do whatever it took to get his blog plastered everywhere. Based on my personal experience, I have noticed him in loads of Blog Battles on Blog Explosion and he seems to actually be getting nominated for various blogging awards and such. But the funny thing is, regarding one blog award in particular... HE NOMINATED HIMSELF! He said "without waiting for anyone to nominate me, I went ahead and nominated this blog"... WHAT?!?!?!?! Why do you think you weren't nominated? And in the ENTERTAINMENT category? I'm totally corn-fused.

Damn, I don't know why all you fuckers haven't nominated me for anything yet.   So, without waiting for anyone to nominate me, I went ahead and nominated myself for President. Because I'm the shit, I'm Diva Dee for gods sake, and I deserve it right? For sure. I'm not waiting on all you people to nominate me, because it's just a given I'd be perfect for the job.

With that being said-- yeah, back to him nominating himself. *giggle* *snort* I think I snorted a little bit of coffee out of my nose when I read that post, so now I must take a break and grab a Kleenex before I add "burned nose hairs" to my list of today's injuries.

Clutter, etc: I'm still laughing over the "I nominated myself" shit.

Would I Return? If I had a choice, the answer would be NO. But since I can't go anywhere in the internet world without this blog turning up like a bad penny, I must admit I probably will be forced to see read him again at some point in the future.

Rating: 1 (Sorry, but the nominating yourself thing was too much for me)

Watching the Wheels - I think?

Watching the Wheels

Just to show I'm not a complete heartless bitch I'm not going to say "come back and ask us for a review when you fucking decide not to change the address and move your blog!"

But I won't say that. Instead, I'll just say that Watching the Wheels is apparently not going to be maintained anymore and she is now at Another Aimless Blog.

Lovely... which one do you want reviewed!? You submitted WTW but now you are at AAB! Regardless, I can't figure out either blog because there isn't a clear "about me" section or my favorite blog necessity for blogs like this that you can't just jump into and figure out.. a note of INTENT!

So, when you get your shit straightened out ask for a re-review. At this point I'm just too confused to be fair.

No rating... it's better than the big fat zero Fida Inc. got!

Fida Inc.

Fida Inc.

I don't even know where to go with this review.... fuck.

Template - I hate it. It really is as simple as that. The font is way too damn small and it's in box format which means larger, creepy spaces between some words. The whole page looks incredibly sloppy and it's full of clutter. The colors are ok, but that is about as far as the generous comments are going to go.

Content - Good god woman pick a fucking direction! Are you going to give me travel advice, bitch about a hilarious video that Alanis did (which was the best thing in your blog) or complain about the payscales of ministers versus presidents. PICK SOMETHING! A travel advice blog is great, but it should be separate. If you want to bitch about why ministers make more than presidents, which is a valid gripe, that is fine but all your shit is lumped together like a gigantic mess of thoughts and it's aggravating. You run the gamut of topics and it's disturbing.

Now, before you guys start shaking your heads and thinking, well, doesn't everyone's blog run the gamut of topics? Yes, you are right. Even my blog runs the gamut but I'm not annoying with tiny font and bad grammar! So there! And I don't lump in travel advice with pointless bullshit about Lance Bass movies!

Sidebar - Yes, I hate that too. It is full of shit that I don't care about. I mean FULL of shit. Seriously.

In Summation - Her posts are hard to read, visually and grammatically and this blog sucks. So, I'm taking the advice she gives in her lame "About Me" sections ... I'm LEAVING!

Rating: the biggest fattest ZERO I have ever given.

The Hot Dog Truck

The Hot Dog Truck - The life and times of a hot dog man

First Impression - Normally I am more than apt to skip this part of the review, but this time I just had to add in this very powerful portion of this review. Okay, not really, but I just HAD to tell my first impression. The first time I saw this on Blog Explosion I immediately was in hate with this blog. I thought it was stupid, immature, ridiculous, and down right dumb. Yep, that sure was my first impression alright! But don't fret hotdog man, it only gets better from here!

Template - Sorry Hotdog man, I could definitely live without the ads, I'm just not that kind of girl. However, the template is fun and almost whimsical. Granted it took me a while to like it, really it did. I have seen the old header and the new one, and I definitely like the new one better. As the Bostonians say - It is wicked cool!

I'm not a fan of the 3 column template though, I just don't love it. It takes away from the stuff you have to say, which is a total shame. AND your far right sidebar is WAY too long, but for some reason I still read it. Normally (and you can ask anyone here) I would totally slam you, but my gut says that you are probably just trying to make money or whatever, and I can accept that.

Content - You have a wicked good variety of posts, some of them funny, some serious, and some that are just there. I personally love that in a blog writer. You don't spend too much time on one subject, and you are genuinely entertaining! From the posts when you first started writing to the posts you are writing now, your writing itself has evolved and I like that. In February you tended to be more conservative and now you seem to be really opening up, which I totally appreciate. In short, I like you, and I like your blog!

Rating - 7 out of 10 - I should be taking more points off for the crap in the sidebar, but I'm trying to overlook it :)

Pocono Mom

Pocono Mom - Life from a mommy's point of view.

Template - As Simon Cowell said to the little known Sanjaya - It's not horrible!
Not that I love it, because I don't really, but its okay. Nothing mind blowing, but it is pretty enough. There is a large enough header with a picture of pretty daisies. It just spells out "I'm a conservative mom". At least that is how I see it. There is no bang, no wow, no pizazz. But if you like simple and calming, then this template is for you. I do love the nicely organized side bar! It is so refreshing to see someone care about their sidebar!

Content - What the fuck? Doesn't this woman know what capitalization is??? Every sentence starts with a small letter. Ugh, if you don't know basic grammar in writing then you shouldn't be writing. That is what that little diary by your bedside is for, in those you can be as lax as you want when you write, but when you write online, you MUST write in proper English.

Before you say it, I'm not an English professor, but at the very least, I don't write sentences that are more than a paragraph long, and at least I capitalize! Ok, wait, every 3rd post is capitalized...what the fuck is that about????

I can't get into the writing, hell, I'll admit it, I won't even try. I have no patience for scriptures and crap about sick kids. Yes, I know both exist, but not for me, not today.

In Summation - If you haven't figured it out already then buy yourself a fucking clue!

Rating - 2 out of 10 (I'm feeling particularly generous even though I dislike that blog immensely)

Jester Tunes

Many things came to mind when I saw this next blog on my list... Jestertunes. Comedic blog full of random thoughts and jokes, poking fun at everyday life.

Was I right? Pretty much.

Do I like it? Let's see, shall we?

Template/Clutter: Purple, purple, purple. That alone makes this blog have a certain endearing quality to me. Most of you will remember the funky purple site us ladies had when we first started reviewing. I know, it was an obnoxious purple, and thankfully we got rid of it. But I did kinda like it. So Jestertunes isn't too bad, because he adds some other color to it. Excellent!

I like the layout of this site, but it's a little busy. There's a lot of info stuck in the sidebar and after a while, my head stated spinning from all the words and color.

Content: Again, another winner because of the "About Me" page. He lives in California with his boyfriend of four years. He loves a good grey goose martini and a Manhattan. Pretty swanky drinks for a guy, but this is coming from a beer-drinking mom NOT living in California. Couple his choice of drinks with the fact that he claims to be a "bit dramatic" and I think we're in for quite the ride.

So here goes... Jestertunes, you're toying with me baby. I started reading the Records Contract Saga from start to finish, got to the end of the posts, and realized its not even the end? Shame on you! Now I have one more blog to add to my bloglines so I can keep up the rest of the story! If you're not feeling the love for this blog like I currently am (even though some of the posts are a bit lengthy), go read my favorite post of his and you'll want to liquor him up with a grey goose martini and have a night out on the town with him just like I do. Seriously, I want to be the Grace to his Will... I'm lovin' his personality that much. Or maybe he's more like Jack? I'm still reading more to find out.

On to less mushy blog love, I'm cruising through his sidebar. I notice all the usual things people shove in there. Popular Posts. Recent Comments. Show Me The Money.

WTF? Show Me The Money? I never could figure out why people put "tip jars" on their site. To help pay for their hosting fees?

I use a free site so why should I pay for yours, my dear? Ah, I digress. On to another topic.

Tip Jars and cluttered sidebars aside, I still like this blog. Jestertunes is quite the looker (he includes pics) and he's funny. An exellent combo in my book.

Let's Review... back to my original two questions. Was I Right? and Do I Like It?

Sort of and YES. It most definitely is a comedic blog full of random thoughts and jokes, poking fun at everyday life. But its also so much more. He has a certain take on things that I am drawn to, and I find myself willing to wade through some undesirable things (clutter, ads, and lengthy posts) to get to know his point-of-view.

Would I Return? Well, yes, I need to know how this record deal turned out, dammit!

Rating: 8

Five Second Dance Party

Sorry we've been so slow cranking out the reviews lately. I'm still recovering from a week of debauchery vacation, and currently am fighting off a sugar-induced marshmallow peep coma. Add to that the 27 Reese's peanut butter eggs I snarfed down over the last two days, and well... you get the idea.

So, Five Second Dance Partyis the site next on my list of reviews. (I know we skipped over a couple, and Sexy Simone will be doing those soon.)

Template: Hmmm. Interesting. A site with no sidebars. I hardly know what to do with myself, because I see nothing to bitch about. No ads, no long sidebars full of crap. Just a girl and her blog. Props for keeping the template simple and neat. Everything has a place. About, Links, Photos, Books. Nice.

Content: I HUGE PINK FLUFFY LACY FANCY HEART people that do a "100 Things" list or an "About Me" page. It's the best way to get to know someone. If only we could do that when we meet someone in person. Hand them a list, let them read it, THEN start the conversation. Things would be different, I just know it!

Sorry, I'm supposed to be talking about Courtney's blog here. Five Second Dance Party. I love her writing, and because I like her posts so much, I've actually taken NOTES on all the books she's read. I'm a book addict, too, and I didn't think there were this many books I hadn't read yet! Plus, its always worth more when you get book recommendations from someone you like, right? We seem to love the same authors, and this alone makes me love her.

Now, enough with the good... now for the bad. Go click on her site, and tell me what's missing.

Go ahead and check for yourself.

I'll wait for you.

(Jeopardy music playing.)

To win the bonus round, did you get the correct answer?

Alex, what is "WHERE ARE THE ARCHIVES?"

Ding, ding, ding... we have a winner!

Maybe I'm stupid and just can't find them, because I have been known to get very frustrated when I can't find Waldo in those stupid book pages. And I have been laughed at by my kids, because I miss some pretty obvious things in the "I Spy" books. But am I missing the archives here?

I tried to read through most of the posts this chick has written, and the only way I could do it was to scroll down to the bottom of each page, and click "Previous Entries." I did this about 15 times (I think-- I quit counting) and gave up.

Archives are good for people that are new to your blog, and want to read a little about you. They are also good for people trying to review the site, as well. (Hint, hint).

EUREKA! I found them! I found Waldo the archives hiding in the "About" page. In the first sentence, there's a link through "two years worth" to a page of archives. AHA! A little hard to find, and I sure hope you don't have to manually change that every time you post something!!

So, all in all, would I return to this blog of hidden archives? YES.

Rating: 8

Some sweet southern comfort with a side of Aqua Net *updated*

Not Much Southern Comfort - But plenty of other offerings....

Template - Ow. My. Eyes. Seriously. As I'm typing this post on a big white screen I am seeing black and white things float across it. You know, like, when a computer screen doesn't use a screen saver and the image gets burned into the screen? Well, like, this has just happened to my eyes. Is it possible for your retinas to hurt? Because mine do. White lettering on a black background should be illegal. It should be a punishable offense and anyone who choses this template scheme should be relegated to the gates of hell, or in her case, Paris, surrounded by ugly and irritated French people demanding that she speak French. Listen, the rest of this review is about to get better, I promise. But PLEASE for the love of God, get a different template. There are plenty of freebies out there and we will help you. If you want simple, do simple. that is fine! Just don't ever, EVER use white lettering on a black background. Your readers just might start sending you bills for the headache medicine they have to keep buying.

Content - I. Love. Her. She had me at hello... ok, well, actually she had me at this... (For those of you with more than one child, you know that when they are hell-bent and presenting a united front to get what they want, it's a tough row to hoe. I swear, if they were put in charge of US Foreign Policy and told that getting our troops out of Iraq would earn them candy or a Bratz doll, the war would be over in less than three days.) I read all of her posts on the first page despite the burning sensation in my corneas (because she is that entertaining) and then went into her archives to read the very first few posts. This post won me over, even though it the deal was already signed, sealed and delivered. This blogger is humorous, entertaining, long-winded (but that's ok) and knows how to tell a story. She writes of her daily life and knows how to keep you interested, even during the long posts.

Sidebar - This doesn't even need a mention because it's short, neat and sweet. Kudos.

In Summation - I. Heart. You.

Rating 8 out of 10 - Sorry, but I took 2 points off for the template. If you get a new one, that is less painful to read, I might consider giving you the two points back... but there might need to be a lot of begging and some bribes consisting of money and food.

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Spandex and Hairspray - Where's my damn Agua Net!?

Template - I want to hate it. The background is beyond cheesy.... think: old school Microsoft Windows screensaver and sitting at your desk, bored out of your mind and staring at those "stars" flying at you until you wanted to puke. The header image is creative though and goes perfectly with the theme and premise of the blog. While we are on that subject, it's about growing up in the 80's... hands down the cheesiest of all decades in the 20th century... so, the lame-ass background fits as well, I suppose. I want to hate it... but, it works. I just think, considering the blog's idea, so much fun could be had to create a great 80's style template.

Content - The premise really is a great idea. It's a woman reminiscing her youth and telling stories of the days past.... in. the. 80's. That's pure entertainment right there. However, what I read wasn't really all that entertaining. It was decent but long and somewhat boring. It's not the stories... it's the way they are told. They need some umph. They need some life. They need some tie-died shirts clipped up on the corner at the hip with a pair of hot pink jelly shoes! Gawd, the horror. You know, I don't really like reliving my 80's... so this blog is a tad painful too. Then there are some stories that aren't meant to be funny but merely a recollection of a something that she endured or that changed her in some way. That's fine... but a little bit of life still needs to be breathed into the posts.

Sidebar - Looooooooonnngg! The cursive font in the second section is hard to read but the rest is fine. Most everything in her sidebar serves a purpose but a few things like her stories could stand to be rolled up neatly. It's just a busy, busy sidebar and it is very distracting.

In Summation - It has a shit load of potential but needs an equal shit load of tweaking. And I'm not talking drops of acid tweaking... though it could be fun. You are onto something girl... it just needs some good old fashion 80's touches.

Rating 5 out of 10 -

Confessions of a New Mommy

Oh no.

Deep breath. In. Out. In. Out.

Any blog that has the word 'mom', 'mommy', or 'mother' in the title has a 50/50 chance of being something decent to read. So, when I saw my next blog to review was titled "Confessions of a New Mommy", I got a little nervous.

And then I started reading, and I figured out where she falls in the world of mommy bloggers. Shall we begin?

Template: Again, a mostly white page. Hmmm. Pretty subdued graphic at the top, but what is with the roses at the very bottom of your sidebar? I'm a little confused by that, because it really has no purpose for being there that I can decipher, and it has nothing to do with the title of the blog or the header graphic.

Other than the goofy roses, the blog is very neat and clean. She hasn't been blogging for long (only since January), so there's not a lot of junk to contend with. Yet. As long as she stays away from sponsored ads and avoids cluttering her little area of the internet world, she'll be just fine.

And girl, I've got the perfect tagline for your blog... because your post about it literally made me laugh my ass off.

Confessions of a New Mommy
...stitches on your cooch suck.

Content: Ah, my favorite part of this blog. Me likey. I can honestly say I have officially sat and read every single post this chick has written, and I'm in love. I have laughed, almost cried, gotten pissed off, the whole range of emotions. Honey, you are way too good for him. He treated you like a poop nugget and you deserve way better. And don't for one minute think YOU got dumped. YOU put your foot down, and he wasn't ready to commit and be an ADULT. Men are pussies when it comes to being mature.

I swear I'm going to make a list of all the cool, hip, kick-ass mommy bloggers out there, and get us all together for a big par-tay. Miss Confessions here would be one of the first on my list, right after Sexy Simone and Ruby Lou. Ma bitches come first, ya know.

Now---On to a more serious note. This twenty-something has been through a lot in her life. A new baby. A man that treated her like crap. The death of both of her parents. And she writes about it all with such flair. I can feel every emotion she's talking about, and it makes me just want to reach out and hug her. And even more so, it makes me want to bitch-slap her ex and his whore.

Would I Return? Hell yes! Miss Confessions is a tough cookie, and she isn't taking shit from anyone. Go check her out, and I think you'll agree.

Rating: 9 (not a 10; but only because I think you need a new template to go with your personality. Your anything but flowers and butterflies, my dear.)

Damn, my spell-check does NOT like the word "cooch."

Blog About Your Blog

OK, here goes... let's see what kind of mood I'm in after my 7+ days of hiatus.

Blog being reviewed: Blog About Your Blog

Template/Clutter: White. 3 columns. Two sidebars right freakin' next to each other. This is not looking good. Recent posts. Recent Comments. List of authors. Blah, blah, fucking blah. Too much, I say! Too damn much!

Content: Basically, this blog is about YOUR blog. Seems simple enough, right? People send in requests to be reviewed. You can send in something quirky or funny or interesting about your blog, and maybe they'll give you a holla'. Hell, they even accept advertising! All for the low, low fee of -- oh wait, they don't say. But they DO take PayPal. Well, alrighty then!

First of all, I checked out their categories, because I just didn't know where to start. This isn't a personal blog telling the saga of someone's daily life. It isn't talking about how cute their kids are. It isn't even talking about how much they hate their job. It's a BLOG ABOUT YOUR BLOG. Hmmmm... categories consist of :

• Advertising
• Affiliates
• Author Interviews
• Blog About Your Blog Info
• Blog Promotion
• Blog Review
• Blogging
• Comment Friday
• General
• How to Get Traffic
• Inspiration
• Internet
• Money-Making
• News
• Personal
• Podcast
• Renters
• Sponsored posts
• Sports

Need I say more? This is basically just a networking traffic generator, and why oh why do I feel like I am in the middle of a huge-ass pyramid scheme?

Will I Return? Probably not. I'm afraid of getting sucked into the networking web.

Rating: 2 (points for one of the authors that I like to read: Chad at Word Up)

I'm Back!

Sorry I had to take a little break people... I know y'all missed me like crazy!

Here are my 2 reviews for tomorrow:

Blog About Your Blog
Confessions of a New Mommy



Be prepared to discuss. :-)

Taking the good with the bad

All-Night.org

I was in the middle of this review when a certain link (to be mentioned later) locked up my computer and caused all of my browser tabs to close, including my 1/2 written review of this blog. I'm highly pissed off and having trouble remembering all that I had written previously...and godammit it was good! But, I'm trying very hard not to let that sway me from now on. You see, initially I was writing a very nice review and it was all kittens and butterflies. Now I'm pissed off. But, it really wasn't the blogger's fault so I can't let that influence this review... but I'm still pissed off! GRRR!!

Template - Upon opening this blog my eyes were pleasantly greeted with warm, soothing colors, a well-organized look and a great general layout. It is an incredibly user-friendly template. With the exception of the archive page (which I'll discuss in a moment...) there is a link back to the home page everywhere you go! That is such a nice bonus. Shit my own damn blog doesn't even have that handy link... an oversight on the designer's part maybe. I should work on that... Anyway, now back to the archive page! This is where it gets orgasmic. No joke. See, the archives are just a sweet little drop of coconut juice in her sidebar (you'll get that when see the template)... it's unobtrusive and unoffensive. Then, you click on that sweet little link and viola! You are transported to a simple page where her past posts are categorized by the month THEN by the subject! It's so easy even a caveman could do it! (God I love those Geico commercials...) Again, the only negative on that page is that I couldn't find a link back to home. Another oversight possibly, but easily fixed I'm sure. Even though the archives take you to other places in the blog, it's still nice to have that "emergency exit" type link everywhere, just in case.

Content - Ok, how do I put this.... it's um... prosaic but still managed to evoke interest in me. That is strictly a personal opinion because I'm fairly certain that most of the readers will be dozing off during their visit. For me, however, she radiated this likability about her that kept me engrossed in the posts, regardless of their mundane nature. I found myself happy that she got a new car and excited about her trip to the zoo. Maybe it's the fact that she is a girl I would be friends with, in a second. I mean, she likes country music and is a NASCAR fan. I'm also a proud card-carrying member of the country music and NASCAR fan clubs. Of course, my interests are not limited to those two things. She is also an advocate for the animals. How could anyone dislike an active animal lover who actually tries to make a difference?! The posts are not well-written per say, there is some grammar issues or misuse of words like "then" for "than" but nothing really major. Despite that, I still found myself enjoying my visit. I went back to the beginning of her blog and found that she has grown quite a bit, in her writing. That is always a good thing. Just beware when you click her Maryland SPCA link... that is the demon that caused me problems... it was probably just a freak thing though. I'm juss sayin' that's all.

Sidebar - This is where the template just gets better. It's so organized and tidy that I'm smitten. It will speak for itself.

In Summation - She doesn't write about anything earth shattering, but she is incredibly likable and her template is a work of art.

Rating 8 out of 10

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Winged Emotion -

Template - I like it, but I'm not in like with it. I do happen to enjoy the little gadgets that this type of template offers... my favorite being the underlining of certain words or phrases that you can simply hover over to get their meaning. I really honestly love that. I love it so much it hurts. The header image is boring but that is just my opinion. I'm fairly certain she is probably more simple in her tastes and that is totally fine where as I tend to lean towards bright lights, flashing neon and head feathers to make me happy.

Content - I'm so bored that my eyes are rolling back in my head. As they roll back my head keeps spinning at her personal accounts of every minute of her day. Oh. My. God. This is why some bloggers shouldn't be blogging. I read her first page of posts and then clicked randomly through the archives (the best part about this blog) and found the same boring drivel and detailings of her cooking and laundry escapades. I. Don't. Care. If you are going to detail your every move, make it interesting, please. As for the archives, I already mentioned she'll get high marks for that. I love how it's organized by month and then day and you can see each post's title. It's great. Kudos for that, at least. But, overall, I find the writing fairly juvenile considering she is a 35 year old woman.

Sidebar - It's fine but there is some useless content that I dislike. But really, it's not bad. It could be worse. I just really don't care at this point.

In Summation - Nice template but a bit mundane, mind-numbing content and a great archive page. That is pretty much it folks....

Rating 3 out of 10 - Obviously just for the template and organization.